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Return of the Chameleon:

Chameleon had been “doing” random strangers throughout 2008 and telling people that it was part of an open-marriage scenario. So, in Fall 2008, I walked out on her.

However, in January 2009, Cham­e­leon contacted me and told me that she'd “changed”.

The problems with her had hap­pen­ed due to drugs, she said, and she was no longer tak­ing them. Every­thing was going to be O.K., but she need­ed my help with a Court issue. If I could do that for her, we could still have a life to­geth­er.

I helped her with the Court issue and, on February 01, 2009, I moved her and her child­ren to Scran­ton, PA. And I moved back in with her.

In May 2009, Cham­e­leon brought home a Catholic girl, age 21 or so. She'd found the girl in a bar.

They went into her bedroom, where Cham­e­leon pressed the girl, who was reluctant, to use a “Hungry Beaver” vibrator on her. This was a device I'd purchased for Cham­e­leon in MI as a gift.

I confronted Cham­e­leon about the Catholic girl subsequently. She said that she'd brought the girl home to evan­gel­ize her.

I noted that I'd heard everything and that it hadn't sound­ed very evan­gel­i­cal. Cham­e­leon got angry and said that I shouldn't have been listening through the door.

But, actually, sounds carried in that place. The fact that the beaver had been hun­gry could be heard right through my own bed­room door.

Days later, on May 19, Cham­e­leon brought home a man with the intention of having sex with him. I escorted the man out, got the ring back from Cham­e­leon, and called off the pretend marriage once and for all.

I don't know what she was thinking. Was the fact she wasn't hiding it this time supposed to mean that I'd accept it?

Maybe she genuinely believed that I was O.K. with polyamory. She was able to con­vince her­self, as well as others, that black was white or 2 plus 2 is 3. But I'd bro­ken up with her just months before over the poly­amory issue.

Cham­e­leon's behavior was similar, come to think of it, to the Fourth Way. She'd offer challenges, but meeting them was never enough. Maybe I was used to that from growing up and thought it was normal. I know I was a “rescuer”. That is a common trait of Adult Children of Alcoholics. They usually end up with people out-of-control like their alcoholic parent.

I'm about 6' 2“ in height. Cham­e­leon was 1' shorter. She had a forceful personality, though, that made height a moot point. She'd set out to be the focus of attention at any church group, party, or bar gather­ing and usually suc­ceed.

Cham­e­leon took the preceding photo using a Polaroid camera that we shared after learning that we had a mutual interest in Polaroids. It's good for a Polaroid snapshot.

For the next page, Abuse in Church Contexts, click here. For the previous page, Chameleon and Me, click here. To jump to the start and the index, click here.